Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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