I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize