woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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