You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
