Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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