..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
