Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
