i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
