If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
