im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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