Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
