If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
