Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
