All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
