The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
