Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
