The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
