where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
