i already hear my dad disowning me
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
