I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
