he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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