I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
