Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
and you fell through a lawn chair
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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