I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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