So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
