i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize