ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
