u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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