We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
