chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
