At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
