Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Randomize
