Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
