He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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