After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i now understand why vodka
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
