I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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