Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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