Non-Jews are for practice
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
