No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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