Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Randomize
