everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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