but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
