It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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