Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I CAN MOONWALK!
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
