The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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