you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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