Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
