Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
The adults are the big ones right?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
