trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
My vagina is very pro this idea
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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