i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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