i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
