Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Randomize
